How can someone get it so wrong? Have it twisted so wrong? Be so wrapped in their own perception of reality that they can't even see how much hurt they have been causing. Not just to themselves. Not just to their families. But to me. Especially to me.
It's suffocating. The amount of it. I try to do what I can and I feel like I'm wading in water, but it's blood, and blood is thicker than water, physics would declare that the body would have a more difficult time, a more strenuous time trying to wade in blood and keep your head above the level so you can breathe. It's exhausting and suffocating, draining and heart breaking but what can I say? Hello, don't you realize that I am dying, and my doctors are out of ideas, and you're so self involved you haven't even bothered to ASK in over three weeks what is going on?
Nope. Can't do that. So I remain the positive supportive one who keeps pushing for everyone to be their best self, to never stop trying. But apparently, I'm not good at that either.
I guess, I just should stop. What's the point anyway? They won't miss me when I'm gone.
And so it goes.
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